Observational Writing- week 10's writing task (this is Eva's)

Observational Writing

Become keen observers of your world!  You should learn to see things not in isolation, but in relation to other things. How do things affect each other? How are they connected? This piece of writing requires you to use your senses – seeing, touching, smelling, to write an accurate description of a prescribed object (that means it is chosen for you).

Assessment Criteria:  

You are to write an accurate description of an object based on careful observation.

Success criteria:

• you note the colour, texture, and shape of the object
• you use adjectives to describe these features in greater detail
• you have a clear order in your finished writing- an introduction, the more detailed information, and a conclusion

This is Eva's planning and writing (she is very descriptive)

General description:

Size- You could say it is the size of a grown man's clenched hand.

shape- There is no particular shape to this object it is more like a blob. There is a mixture of a rectangle, circle and oval. gone wrong, egg shaped

colour- It has a very pale pink lines separating  Dark red, and a grey almost white brown. There is a big blob of the pale pink with a reder pink down the bottom. shiny,

texture- Slimey, gooey, blobbery. shiny , looks almost wet. creases where blood vessels were.
smell- I can’t smell it

Detailed description:

What’s it like inside?- Gooey, slimy, smooth, hard, tough, fat was like bone, bloody.

Three paragraphs:

Sitting in front of me is a blob of gooey meat. You really can’t tell what the exact shape of it is but it is kind of like a rectangle, circle and an oval mixed together and  gone wrong. In another way you could say it looked like a red, pink, grey and brown large smooshy egg.

Like the shape of it, you can’t really tell how big it is but if you want to describe it in some way you could say that it is the size of a grown adults clenched hand. It is about that size in length, width and depth. It isn’t something particularly nice to say have in your room and if you are squeamish you won’t want to look at it. The outside is like what I just described but the inside is a whole new story.

When you cut it open it is blood and more blood everywhere. It is gooey, slimy, smooth and tough all at the same time. The fat is like bone. Tree branch like muscles fill in the inside.